Try this one for size ...

(May 03, 2014)

OK this is how it goes. I’d like you to leave your comfortable house, pack your tent, camping stove, water carrier and some sustenance (mostly bread, burgers and beer), drive to a field and stay there for a few days along with several thousand other people. You’re going to take a huge risk on the British weather – it could be glorious equally it could be autumnal temperatures and torrential rain. There will be above average to appalling toilet blocks, showers (sometimes) and (frequently) mud, yes there can be lots of mud and lots of walking. The reaction from a huge percentage of the population of a certain age will be a mix or incredulity to an outright declaration of insanity on your part followed by a few deleted expletives.

However, add some music, exotic (sic) food outlets, stalls selling everything from silver bangles to lunatic hats, and the chance to dress like a hippy for a few days and those not travelling in the same way could well get trampled in the rush. It’s as certain as death and taxes, offer those average folk the chance to sit in a field and listen to music and all rational social structures, strata and restrictions fly straight out of the window.

This year with its warm days and balmy nights has doubtless tempted many more than usual to throw off suburbia and head for the festivals. Nothing like a touch of sunshine to bring us out in droves. However, these islands have a weather system like almost no other place – snow in April is not unknown and neither is a heatwave in October. So gird up your loins festival goers and throw yourselves into the mix with abandon. After all no matter how tired/ drunk/ muddy/ wet/ sunburned (tick as applicable) you are there’s always that safe, centrally heated home with flushing toilets and hot running water waiting for you to return.

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